Fraud

I don’t feel like it.

I know I should pray.  I know I should read my Bible.  I should confide in my BFF, but I don’t want to.

Lately, I’ve felt discouraged.  If a friend had confided in me, asking for advice to remedy her list of these common complaints and feelings, without a doubt I know how I would respond.  Change your thinking, focus on truth. Ask God for help. 

It’s easy to tell other people what do.  Encouraging women is kind of my jam. But when I’m pelted by the hailstones of discouragement, it’s nearly impossible to listen.  Even to myself. 

The enemy taunts me, firing sharp-edged accusations into the shadows.  How dare I speak to my sisters when my own mind is utter chaos?  I am a mess.

I’m a fraud -disillusioned, incompetent, inadequate, a loser.  I’m called to cheer women on and all the while I sit staring at a blank page with absolutely no right to say a thing.  I won’t pretend I’m some kind of expert, as I’m confronted with the same attacks we all face. Oppressive darkness envelopes me, thickness smothering.  I slump in defeat.

But slowly, one small quiet thought seeps out through a crack. Two words. 

“Help me.”

Relief is not immediate.  No clouds parting like an epic adventure movie, no dramatic film score playing in the background.  No cool air floods the room, but a new thought.  Request back up.  Join forces.

Moment by moment, gaining sight, I recognize the attack for what it is.  Remember the battle unseen by mortal eyes.

I love the visual of the ancient Roman armour.  In battle, their oval shields could be linked together to create an impenetrable defensive barrier.  What a great reminder to bind together.  Pray for each other and stand firm.

Listen, sister, aren’t we all fighting some sort of battle?

Fighting addiction, fighting cancer, fighting discouragement, fighting fear, fighting lies. 

What are you struggling with these days?  Our lives are a constant fight.   But KNOW THIS, we don’t fight alone.  Let’s click our shields together and form a solid defense against the enemy.

Remember the truth of who you are.  If you have a relationship with Jesus, you are a daughter of the King!  Talk to Him, He’s always listening.

Let’s be honest and transparent with our friends.  Don’t pretend to be “fine” when you really aren’t.  Hold one another up in prayer.  Be there.  Support each other in words and actions.

Trust that God is listening and ready to help.  He’s waiting for you.  And rejoice in the clinking armour as we fight our battles together.

♥ Tess

My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God; on behalf of a man he pleads with God as one pleads for a friend.  Job 16:20-21

I call on you, my God, for you will answer me; turn your ear to me and hear my prayer. Psalm 17:6